The downward spiral
More than three years of my life have gone into this job. What have I got to show for it? Twenty thousand in my paltry savings fund when I leave by the end of the year. Stress-related injuries and illnesses. A wealth of observation and insight but no time to really write them down.
Is this job still worth holding on to? Is it the middle class brat in me feeling ungrateful for everything, or am I really getting damaged bit by bit?
It's so easy for other people to let go of sucky jobs. Why can't I? Sometimes I ask for signs that I'm on the right track. But here at work everything's been collapsing around me. If I had a sharper sense of humor I'd think it fantastic, if it wasn't so horrible. It's like clockwork. It's been really pouring down.
No, really, is it too much to ask for something better than this?
I feel like some stupid delinquent kid getting these fucking memos and suspensions for things that aren't really all that important. No biggie to me, but it's a biggie to the bosses, of course. I know that we're all shoveling shit one way or another, whether you're a manager or a corporate serf; but my sense of empathy has been dumbed down so much it's amazing. I used to be so optimistic and now it seems I've stopped caring.
I'm this close to resigning but the one light at the end of the tunnel is the thought that the 13th month pay to be handed out on November 30 plus the tax adjustment by year's end is tuition money for my grad studies. This is all about money actually. If it weren't for the pay (which isn't all that great) I'd have cleared out ages ago. But it is, and so I'm trying to hold on. Just a few more months and I'm gone. And the poor sucker who'll get my job will be asking why he/she deserved such karmic retribution that he/she landed a job as hellish as this.
More than three years of my life have gone into this job. What have I got to show for it? Twenty thousand in my paltry savings fund when I leave by the end of the year. Stress-related injuries and illnesses. A wealth of observation and insight but no time to really write them down.
Is this job still worth holding on to? Is it the middle class brat in me feeling ungrateful for everything, or am I really getting damaged bit by bit?
It's so easy for other people to let go of sucky jobs. Why can't I? Sometimes I ask for signs that I'm on the right track. But here at work everything's been collapsing around me. If I had a sharper sense of humor I'd think it fantastic, if it wasn't so horrible. It's like clockwork. It's been really pouring down.
No, really, is it too much to ask for something better than this?
I feel like some stupid delinquent kid getting these fucking memos and suspensions for things that aren't really all that important. No biggie to me, but it's a biggie to the bosses, of course. I know that we're all shoveling shit one way or another, whether you're a manager or a corporate serf; but my sense of empathy has been dumbed down so much it's amazing. I used to be so optimistic and now it seems I've stopped caring.
I'm this close to resigning but the one light at the end of the tunnel is the thought that the 13th month pay to be handed out on November 30 plus the tax adjustment by year's end is tuition money for my grad studies. This is all about money actually. If it weren't for the pay (which isn't all that great) I'd have cleared out ages ago. But it is, and so I'm trying to hold on. Just a few more months and I'm gone. And the poor sucker who'll get my job will be asking why he/she deserved such karmic retribution that he/she landed a job as hellish as this.
1 Comments:
Well, sino pa ba ang mas kakawawa sa aming mga nagtatrabaho sa call center?
By
Joel, at 8:04 PM
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